A young couple fills in a marriage application form at a register office in Beijing on Oct 10, 2009. Chinese believe the tenth of the tenth means shi quan shi mei (perfect), while nine means yong jiu (forever).[Agencies]
SHANGHAI - Disposing of those cockamamie ceremonies and expensive banquets, the eco-friendly "naked" marriage is the choice of a small group of urbanites.
"It was our mutual desire to have a plain wedding," said Zhang Wen, a 30-year-old magazine founder in Shanghai, speaking also on behalf of his wife. "In our opinion, a wedding is a personal issue instead of a social gathering. It appears to me that the conventional wedding is a kind of externalism."
The so-called bare marriage or naked marriage refers to a desire to hold one's wedding without ceremony, a photo shoot, honeymoon and, sometimes, even no wedding ring, house or car. The cost of the cheapest bare marriage is just 9 yuan, with the fee going to the marriage registration office of the Department of Civil Affairs.
For Zhang Wen and bride-to-be, the whole process of getting married was reduced to a dinner with friends and family members in an ordinary restaurant that cost him hundreds, rather than thousands, of yuan. The joint monthly salaries of the couple at the beginning of last year when they wed, was more than 20,000 yuan.
"Bare marriage is worth encouraging, because the basic idea behind it is that an economical wedding involves no waste of resources," said Zhou Xiaozheng, a professor of sociology at the People's University of China.
Expert comments suggest a change in views about marriage nowadays. However, parents of the post-80s generation, who make up the main contingent of brides and grooms today, stand firmly on the side of conventional weddings and consider those who support the idea of bare marriages have "crossed a line".
"I wouldn't accept it if my daughter came to me and told me 'I got registered to married'. After all, I raised her to a 20-something-year-old and that's it?" said a woman surnamed Jin who was busy with her daughter Grace Yu's upcoming wedding in a five-star hotel.
Apart from this, the traditional Chinese value of "saving face" is also a concern for Jin. "The relatives would find it strange (if we don't hold the ceremony, banquet and don't invite them). They will think, 'What's wrong with your family'," she said.
Another group of parents is opposed to naked marriages for different reasons. "I didn't have a grand wedding when I got married because of the limitations on living conditions in our day, and I always feel like it's a wish unfulfilled," said 49-year-old housewife Yang Hong. "I'd love to hold a luxury wedding for my child if it can be afforded. It's not a waste if it's money spent on something that's meant to be wasted."
Disagreement between the two generations creates embarrassment about bare marriages. It remains an ideal for young couples but it's not accepted by parents. The solution, according to sociology professor Hu Shoujun, from Fu Dan University, is to communicate and compromise.
"Why can't we combine the views of both sides together?" he said. "Getting married is a good thing at the end of the day. Also, we should remember, it's all about personal choice. Those who choose a bare marriage shouldn't criticize those who prefer a grand marriage, and those in favor of a big wedding should keep quiet about naked marriages."
